Pain “down there” is one of those things that’s hard to talk about — even harder to describe. Sometimes it burns, stings, or feels sore for no clear reason. You might even start thinking, “Am I overreacting?”
You’re not.
If you’ve been feeling vulva pain that doesn’t go away, you might be dealing with something called vulvodynia. A real, common, and treatable condition.
So, what is vulvodynia?
Vulvodynia (pronounced vul-voh-DIN-ee-uh) simply means chronic pain in the vulva — the outer part of your genitals that lasts for three months or longer without a clear cause like an infection or skin condition.
It’s not “in your head.” It’s your body asking for care.
Doctors still don’t fully understand why it happens, but it’s thought to be linked to things like:
- Overactive nerve endings around the vulva
- Past infections or irritation
- Hormonal changes
- Muscle tension or pelvic floor dysfunction
- Even emotional stress that the body stores as physical pain
Sometimes, it starts suddenly; other times, it builds up over time.
What does it feel like?
Vulvodynia pain can show up in different ways — everyone’s experience is a little different.
You might notice:
- A burning, stinging, or raw feeling on your vulva
- Pain during sex, inserting a tampon, or even sitting for long periods
- Itching or soreness that doesn’t respond to creams or treatments
- Sensitive skin around the opening of your vagina
It can happen all over the vulva or just in one area (often called vestibulodynia when it’s near the vaginal opening).
How it affects more than your body
Pain that doesn’t go away can mess with your confidence, relationships, even your sense of self.
You might start avoiding intimacy or feeling anxious about being touched.
But here’s the truth — you’re not broken. Pain doesn’t make you “less feminine” or “less sexual.”
It just means your body’s asking for a different kind of attention right now.
What can help?
While vulvodynia isn’t something you can just “wait out,” there are effective ways to manage and treat it.
Here’s where to start:
1. Talk to a healthcare provider you trust
Preferably one experienced in gynecology or pelvic pain. They might do a gentle exam to rule out infections or skin conditions first.
2. Try gentle self-care
- Wear breathable cotton underwear
- Avoid scented soaps, wipes, and tight clothes
- Use plain water or mild cleansers to wash the vulva (never inside the vagina)
- Apply cool compresses or recommended topical treatments
3. Explore pelvic floor therapy
A pelvic floor therapist can help relax the muscles that might be tightening and worsening the pain.
4. Mental health support
Chronic pain can take a toll emotionally. Talking to a therapist or joining a support group helps — not because the pain is “psychological,” but because your body and mind are deeply connected.
The takeaway
If you’ve been living with unexplained vulva pain, please know this: you’re not imagining it, and you’re not alone.
Vulvodynia is real and treatable. With patience, support, and the right care, most people start to feel like themselves again. Your comfort, your pleasure, your peace — all of that still belongs to you.